Chapter 8
Reality - Whether we like it or not
Reality is the totality of all things, structures, events,
and phenomena which exist independent of our perceptions, desires or
imagination. A tree exists whether we see it or not. Philip K. Dick wrote, “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn’t go away.” Reality,
as defined in this model, is not that of idealism (what exists in our mind) or constructivism
(a concept we collectively build - like money or nations). It is also not the
reality of Quantum physics (with the uncertainty of subatomic particles) or
spirituality (like the Hindu/Buddhist view that reality - Maya - is a veil). The reality of this book is that of Newtonian physics.
It is a material universe governed by laws of matter, energy, space, and time.
Our senses evolved not to reveal the complete truth of the
world, but to provide just enough information for survival. Peril lies in our
denial of the reality we can perceive. Reality doesn’t care if we misunderstand
it, but we should try to comprehend that which we can. How do we deny reality?
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We treat feelings as reality
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We believe what we want to be true
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We ignore evidence that challenges our identity
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We assume our memory is accurate
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We avoid problems instead of facing
them
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We overestimate our control
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We underestimate risks (or overestimate
rare ones)
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We cling to tribal narratives
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We confuse opinions with knowledge
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We believe “This won’t happen to me”
What are the consequences of denying reality?
When a person notices persistent pain,
fatigue, and unexplained weight loss but avoids seeing a doctor due to the fear
of knowing or the inconvenience of making the appointment, they run serious
health risks.
When people continue their compulsive
online purchases despite their limited finances because they like the sense of
freedom and they hate penny-pinching, they end up paying horrible credit card
interest rates and risk bankruptcy.
When a woman stays in a toxic, abusive
relationship because of the fear of loneliness and the hope that her partner will
change, she risks continued physical and mental abuse.
When a man assumes malice when the
cause is misunderstanding, stress, or a difference in communication styles, he
risks ruining relationships.
When an employee stops learning and
growing because he/she/they feel they know enough to get by, they risk losing career
advancement.
When people reject climate science,
vaccine data, or public-health recommendations because they conflict with their
identity or tribal loyalty, they risk harming thousands, even millions.
When people share false online narratives because they reinforce their worldview, they risk causing huge
social divides.
When developers build in a floodplain,
refuse to prepare for earthquakes, or ignore wildfire risks because of
short-term financial loss, they risk putting people and property in peril.
When people throw their fast-food
wrappers out of their car windows, because they are blind to trash along the
roadside, they create an eyesore and jeopardize community pride.
When a person equates their own emotional
reactions with objective reality, they risk interpersonal strife.
When people vote for a candidate based on a single issue, while ignoring all the politician’s faults, they invite a collapse of effective government.
Reality is never offended by our denial – it simply continues to operate. But when we align our beliefs and actions with how the world truly works, we reduce harm, make better decisions, and live with greater integrity.
An
argument could be made that there is an input that exerts an even greater
influence on us than reality. Let’s call that input - Influencers.