Self-Reflection - Values
Related Chapters: Chapter 19 – Values • Chapter 66 – Renewing our Personal Values
Purpose
Values help answer one of life's most important questions:
"What kind of person do I want to become?"
Some values guide how we live with other people. They are the commitments we make—implicitly or explicitly—to the communities in which we live. They help build trust, cooperation, fairness, and mutual respect.
Other values are deeply personal. They shape the kind of life we hope to live, the experiences we seek, and the qualities we wish to develop within ourselves.
This reflection explores both. Neither set of values is more important than the other. A meaningful life often requires learning to honor both our responsibilities to others and our aspirations for ourselves.
Part I
My Commitments to Others
Living in a society brings both benefits and responsibilities. The following statements invite you to reflect on the promises you strive to keep with the people around you.
Reflection Statements
There will be no scoring in this Reflection. Write your response in the blank preceding each statement using the following scale:
1 = Rarely 2 = Sometimes 3 = Often 4 = Almost Always
_______ 1. I try to be someone other people can trust.
_______ 2. I try to contribute more to my community than I take from it.
_______ 3. I accept responsibility when I make mistakes.
_______ 4. I usually keep my promises and commitments.
_______ 5. I try to treat people fairly, even when I disagree with them.
_______ 6. I willingly contribute my time or abilities when I can make a positive difference.
_______ 7. I try to cooperate rather than create unnecessary conflict.
_______ 8. I am willing to stand up for what I believe is right, even when doing so is uncomfortable.
Looking Beyond These Responses
- Which of these commitments has been easiest for you to live?
- Which one has challenged you the most?
- If everyone in your community lived these commitments consistently, what kind of community would it become?
- Which commitment would those closest to you most readily recognize in your daily life?
- What important question do you wish had been included?
Part II
My Personal Values
Beyond our responsibilities to others, each of us develops values that shape the kind of life we hope to live. These values influence our priorities, goals, relationships, and daily choices.
Write your response in the blank preceding each statement using the following scale:
1 = Rarely 2 = Sometimes 3 = Often 4 = Almost Always
_______ 1. My daily life reflects what is most important to me.
_______ 2. I regularly make time for the people and activities I value most.
_______ 3. I have a reasonably clear sense of what gives my life meaning.
_______ 4. I am living according to my own values rather than simply meeting other people's expectations.
_______ 5. I periodically reconsider whether my priorities still reflect the life I want to live.
_______ 6. I am becoming the kind of person I hope to be.
_______ 7. My choices generally reflect my long-term values more than my short-term impulses.
_______ 8. I hope to continue growing as a person throughout the rest of my life.
Looking Beyond These Responses
- Which personal value most influences your life today?
- Are your daily habits consistent with your deepest values?
- Which value would you most like to strengthen during the coming year?
- Looking back over your life, have your values changed? If so, how?
- What important question do you wish had been included?
One Small Experiment
During the coming week, notice one decision you make each day—large or small.
Afterward, ask yourself: "Which value influenced that decision?"
Don't judge the answer.
Simply notice whether your daily choices are gradually creating the kind of person you hope to become.
Reflection Notes (Optional)
Use this space to capture any thoughts, insights, questions, surprises, or intentions that came to mind while completing this reflection.
A Note About This Reflection
Our values become visible not when we talk about them, but when we live them. The promises we keep with others help build the kind of communities in which people can flourish. The values we hold for ourselves shape the kind of life we experience from within.
Character may be found where these two meet.
A fulfilling life is not built solely by pursuing personal dreams, nor solely by meeting our obligations to others. It grows from learning to honor both—becoming someone whose life reflects not only what they hope to receive from the world, but also what they hope to contribute to it.